Lofty Aspirations

Here’s the job I want:  naming nail polish colors.  Ladies have you seen this?  The last time I was at the Salon waiting for the nice Chinese lady to ring me up, I started to look at the nail polish on the counter. 

I noticed that a certain brand had colors in a series.  One series was obviously “French” because the individual polish names were ‘A Oui Bit of Red’, ‘Bastille My Heart’ and ‘I’m Fondue of You.’  Isn’t that clever?   

What I want to know is; what are the qualifications for this job?  Do you need a college education or would attending a frat party be enough?  Because personally, I think I could be good at it. 

I’d like to do a series called Medical Afflictions.  I’d have a shade of orange called ‘Clogged Arteries,’ a nice shade of blue called ‘Erectile Dysfunction’ and a soft shade of purple called ‘Kidney Stones.’  Now that’s clever!