Tip This

Is there any establishment, anywhere on the planet that doesn’t feel compelled to stick a tip jar in front of my face these days?  It isn’t bad enough that we have to supplement the salaries of underpaid waiters and waitresses, now you can’t walk into a Dunkin Donuts without finding a bowl on the counter with a sign that says ‘Tips for the Workers’ with a big smiley face on it. 

I recently saw a tip jar on the counter of the ‘take-out’ section of a restaurant. Isn’t that priceless?  I ordered the food, drove to the restaurant, got out of my car and walked into the building to pick it up and after the pimply faced kid behind the counter took his finger out of his nose, he turned around, removed my order from the shelf behind him where somebody else had placed it, and handed it to me.  And I was supposed to tip him? 

Here’s a tip for you.  ‘Go to college and become a doctor so you don’t have to depend on the kindness of people like me.’